Re-Evaluating Goals

My trainer broke my heart this morning.  Well, after he kicked my ass, that is!
As I've mentioned here once or twice... I'm still stuck.  Weight wise I haven't
done a damn thing in months.  He knows this, but I haven't dwelled on it too much.  However, the other day I started wondering if maybe my goal is unrealistic.  Maybe at my age, I'm not supposed to get down to 150 pounds.  While I still refuse to believe that my current weight and body shape are as good as it gets, maybe it's close to as good as it gets.  So, we had another conversation this morning.

The good news is that he doesn't necessarily think my goal weight is unrealistic.  The bad news is that, because of my age, It's going to really be a struggle.  Apparently, after age 35, your metabolism takes a nose dive.  Heart = broken. It's not just our imagination ladies, my trainer confirmed it! So, maybe now is the time to re-evaluate my goals.

I picked 150 pounds (my goal weight) many, many years ago.  I picked it because it's a nice round number.  Plus, I started out at 197 pounds, so I could say that I had lost almost 50 pounds.  It sounds good, right?  But, when I picked that number, I didn't know what I know now.

When I lost weight the first time it was easy, but I didn't fully appreciate why.  Now I do.  I know that #1, I lost it quickly because I was younger.  But #2, I lost it quickly because I was losing fat as well as muscle.  To look at pictures of myself after WW, I was skinny.  Now, I can say I'm more muscular, and I need to take that muscle weight into account.  If I stopped weight training and went strictly on cardio and losing "weight", I could get to 150.  But, to do that I'd lose muscle.  That's just not a trade off that I'm willing to make.

It's taken me a lot of years to get to this point, but I'm starting to truly appreciate how hard I've worked to get here.  Not just the physical work, but the mental work as well.  It's been an extremely long road.  What started off as a weight loss journey has turned into a life transformation.  Along with tackling the weight, I've had to fight demons.  I've been learning how to deal with my issues and feelings without turning to food.  I've come to love my weight training because I love to see just how much my body can do.  I love conquering things that previously scared me.  It's starting to be about something more than the weight.  That's why I think I can let go of that 150.

I'm not giving up on the idea of losing more weight.  I still want to get rid of that pesky "mom pooch" that has been with me for so long.  I still have some extra weight in my gut that needs to go.  But, I just don't think I need to get down to 150 pounds to get there.  While it would be great to say "I weigh 150 pounds" or "I've lost just under 50 pounds", I know first hand how great it feels to say "I can dead lift 160 pounds" (which I can do, thank you very much! :-) ) That's becoming more important to me than the number on the scale.