No (Bake) Problem

I love to bake.  My kids love to help me bake.  This has both its ups and downs.  The "up" is that it's a great way to hang out and do something with my kids that doesn't involve a screen.  Another "up" is that it's teaching them about measuring, fractions, cooking, baking, and lots of other life skills that will serve them well in the future.  However, there are a few "downs" as well.  Once you've baked, your goodies are in your house.  They smell and look delicious.  Herein lies the dilemma...

Yesterday afternoon we made No Bake Cookies.  I love eating No Bakes as much as I love to make them.  So, what do I do when 3 dozen yummy cookies sit on my counter calling my name?  Naturally, I give them away!  Now, I won't pretend to be so strong that I didn't eat any, because I did.  I had 3 of them.  But that's it.  I did save 8 for the kids and hubby to eat today and tomorrow. But the rest have been packed up and are on their way to work with my husband!  It's the best of both worlds.  I can bake to my heart's content and my husband's co-workers love me. Win-win!

No Longer Afraid

Met with the trainer this morning for the first time and I LOVED IT!!!  I don't know what I was so afraid of!  Well, I take that back.  I do know what I was afraid of, it just wasn't an issue.  And that spark that I was hoping to find?  

I think I found it!  

Hello and Goodbye

Hello to almost 1,000 blog hits! And goodbye to a 10 pound range!  I won't mention which range it is, but I'm out of one and down into another.  I hope to never see it again!

I am down 1.2 pounds for this week!  That makes a total of 17.2 pounds.  It's actually only .2 pound difference from when I started this blog, but I'm still happy about it.  I'm happy because although I haven't had a significant change in my numbers since I started blogging, I feel a significant change in my attitude.  I feel a definite change in my feelings about the whole process.  When I started, I was focused on the week to week weight loss.  While I'm still interested in what I lose from one week to the next, now I'm much more focused on my daily progress.  I'm feeling a difference in my exercise as well.  Before, I was going to the gym and going through the motions.  Now, I'm exercising with a purpose.  I'm investing time (and money) in me.  With the help of a trainer, I hope to not just continue to lose the weight, but also to gain definition in my muscles and improve my overall strength.  I'm hoping that it will spark something in me that will lead to more
good things.

I'm saying Hello to my new, more positive approach to weight loss and Goodbye to the old ways and bad habits that have held me back!  I hope you all have a fabulous week!

Right Now

Something is different right now.  I can't quite put my finger on it, but I feel different...

Right now, this phase of my journey feels legitimate.
I'm not messing around.
Right now, I'm making some good food choices.
I'm logging small losses most days.
Right now, I've got my head in the game.
I'm not only talking the talk, I'm starting to walk the walk.

Part of it might be the fact that I dished out a bit of hard earned money for a trainer, so I don't want bad food choices to affect that.  Part of it might be that now that I'm blogging, it's all out there for everyone to see.   I'm not sure. I could speculate on a lot of different reasons.  But maybe, just maybe, I'm finally ready to do this.  Really ready to do this.  Maybe something finally clicked in my head.  Whatever it is, right now feels great!

Rowing Update and Other Stuff

The "Row the River" challenge is officially done at my gym. I didn't even come close!  But, as promised, I'll continue to update my progress until I actually finish this thing.  There will probably be snow on the ground when I get there, but I'll
get there!

I also, once again, beat my previous personal best on my rowing pace.  My previous best was 1:49/500m.  Today I topped out at 1:45!  Unfortunately, the instructor was right there at my side, watching my numbers, so he's aware of how hard I can work when I want to.  Nuts!  :-)

My eating seems to be much more under control this week, which is wonderful.  Despite Mother Nature, I actually anticipate a small loss this week!  We'll see how it goes...

A Done Deal

Well, after lots of talking and planning, I finally did it.  The money had been saved.  The personal trainer has been contacted.  The first appointment has been made.  And I'm scared to death!

In fact, as I was making the appointment this morning, I thought I was going to throw up!  I actually had a nervous stomach before I even got to the gym.  I knew that if I saw the trainer, I was going to make it official today.  And that thought alone was enough to make me feel sick.

Don't get me wrong, I definitely want to do this.  I need to do this.  I've been planning and saving for quite a while.  I really want to have a workout that's designed specifically for me.  I want to do things that will challenge me beyond what the machines at the gym can do.  I want to add variety to my workout.

I just don't want to be the center of attention.

I don't want to have someone watch me exercise.  I don't want to feel like I'm being judged.  I don't want to go back to being the fat girl in gym class with the skinny kids watching me.  I don't want to have to let someone else know my weight, BMI, and body fat composition.  My husband doesn't even know what I weigh, why would I want a trainer to?

But, thanks to my good friend (who is also a trainer), I am reminded that a good trainer isn't going to judge.  I am not the first, nor will I be the last person with a weight issue that they'll deal with.  And, I guarantee I'm not the heaviest person they've ever trained!  A good trainer will want me to succeed.  It actually makes them look good to have their clients excel. They're rooting for us to make positive progress because it means that they're doing their job.  So, that being said, I'm going to try to settle my nervous stomach and look forward to my appointment on Monday morning!

WARNING: Colorful Language Ahead

Mother Nature is a Bitch!

That sentence could be a post just by itself.  I truly think that we, as women, should get a once-a-month weigh-in pass.  It's so frustrating to weigh X pounds on Sunday and then weigh X+3 pounds the next day.  Seriously? While my food choices weren't perfect yesterday, I certainly didn't eat enough to gain 3 pounds today!  I can only credit this massive gain to one thing...
Mother Nature is a Bitch!

Normally, I enjoy being female.  I love that my body was built to bear children.  I love wearing beautiful dresses, make-up, pretty jewelry.  I love that I can take care of my kids in a way that their daddy can't.  I love that gentlemen will hold the door open for me.  There are lots of things to love about being a girl.  Except when Mother Nature is a Bitch...

The Week In Review

I'm glad this week is over!  I really didn't realize how much I rely on my exercise to help with my weight loss.  In fact, I ended up gaining .4 this week and I'm quite sure it is due to lack of exercise.  Luckily the gym opens tomorrow and I can get back in the swing of things.

I don't know what happened though.  I used to be highly motivated to exercise on my own.  I own more Richard Simmons, Tae Bo, Biggest Loser, Booty Sculpt, Walk Away The Pounds exercise videos than I care to count!  And I used to do them... religiously!  Now, not so much.  When I did them before, it was pre-children.  It wasn't a big deal to get up early in the morning to work out because no one had woken me up the night before.  And, once I got started, I didn't have to stop every three minutes to settle an argument, get someone a drink of water, or anything else in the long list of things that moms have to do.  It was much easier to carve out that time for myself.

Now, the gym is kind of like a reward for me.  I enjoy my time there because that's exactly what it is... MY time.  There are no kids allowed.  I can do my workout without interruptions.  I get to focus on myself.  I don't have to worry about tripping over a child, or a dog, or a toy.  I can't wait to get back.

Perfect

"You’re so mean
When you talk
About yourself
You are wrong
Change the voices
In your head
Make them like you
Instead
So complicated
Look how big you’ll make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It’s enough
I’ve done all i can think of
Chased down all my demons
see you do the same
Pretty pretty please don’t you ever ever feel
Like you’re less then, less than perfect
Pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel
Like you’re nothing you are perfect, to me"  

~Perfect by Pink


If you've never actually listened to the words of this song, I encourage you to do so.  For those of you who view this with the speakers off, you should turn on your speakers, scroll down to my playlist and play this song.  I've touched on it before, but we tend to be pretty hard on ourselves.  We dwell on the negative and forget to see the positives in ourselves.  It's so important to remember that no matter what, there is someone out there who thinks we're perfect just the way we are!

Hurry Up Monday!

Last night's dinner with my girlfriend was much better than my first attempt at Applebee's!  I ordered the Cajun Lime Tilapia from the Weight Watchers menu. Delicious!  I even had enough calories left over to have a Hot Fudge Sundae Shooter.  Super good!  All in all, a successful evening. :-)

I'm finding myself a little lost this week, however.  With the gym being closed, I had great intentions of working out at home with my daughter.  For lots of different reasons, that hasn't happened yet.  I am just not as motivated to workout when I'm home. My daughter and I do plan to do a 2 mile Walk Away The Pounds video today, so that will help.  But, otherwise, I have just found way too many others things to do and Richard Simmons isn't one of them.  Luckily today is Thursday and the gym re-opens on Monday~and it can't get here fast enough!

Armed With Information

You know the old saying "Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me"?  Well, those are my feelings toward Applebee's now.  As you might recall, I went there a couple weeks ago and ordered the Oriental Chicken Salad~to the tune of 1200 calories!  Well, a good friend of mine and I are going there for dinner tonight.  That salad is a mistake I won't make again.

You see, there's this fabulous invention called the internet ( insert sarcasm here...).  Most restaurants ~ including Applebee's ~ post their nutritional information online.  This time, I'll visit their site before I go.  This time, I'll know what I'm going to order before I walk in the door.   This time, armed with information, I'll make a good decision that will actually help my weight loss journey, not hurt it!

Sassy Meatloaf

It's been a little while since I shared a recipe, so I thought I'd share one now.  This is my absolute favorite, "go-to" dinner recipe.  I've made it more times than I can count and it's super yummy!!

Sassy Meatloaf (Weight Watchers Simply The Best Cookbook)
Makes 6 Servings

1 Pound Lean Ground Beef (10% Fat or Less)
1 1/4 Cup Low Sodium Salsa (I use regular salsa)
3/4 Cup Quick-Cooking Oatmeal
1 Carrot Shredded
2 Plum Tomatoes, Diced
1/2 Cup Coarsely Chopped Mushrooms

Preheat the oven to 350.  Spray a loaf pan with non-stick cooking spray.  In a large bowl, combine all ingredients and shape the mixture into a loaf.  Place the loaf in the pan. Bake about 1 hour and 5 minutes (until browned and a knife inserted in the center comes out clean and hot).  Let stand about 10 minutes before slicing.

Each serving is 183 calories, 8 grams total fat.  For you Weight Watchers, it's 4 points (on the old points system).  Because of the salsa, carrots, and tomatoes, it also counts as 1 vegetable!

Now, I should add that I hate tomatoes.  Really hate tomatoes.  So, when I make this recipe, I leave them out.  The beauty of this recipe is that you can sneak in lots of different vegetables.  They cook up nicely in the meatloaf and you don't even know they're there.  In fact, tonight I'm going to chop up some broccoli extra fine and cook that in there!  Just don't tell my husband ;-)  Enjoy!

The Week In Review

I'm doing the happy dance today!  I was down 2.4 pounds for the week!  I haven't had a week this good in a long time.  The size 12 jeans zipped up this afternoon and life is good :-)

Next week my gym will be closed for it's annual maintenance.  I'm definitely going to have to go old school as far as my workouts.  I guess it will be a good time to dust off Richard Simmons and give him another shot! :-)

Edited to Add:

In the interest of honesty and all, I should admit that I figured out that my math was a little off.  Either that or I forgot what my starting weight was, so I was off.  Anyway, I ended up being down 1.6 pounds, not 2.4...  A loss is still a loss, so I'm still happy! ;-)

A Personal Best

The last few weeks in rowing we've been doing some sprints. I had no clue you could sprint on a rowing machine, but apparently you can!  Anyway, the object is to get your pace as low as you can.  The numbers we typically look at are the time it takes for you to row 500 meters.  3:00/500m is a pretty relaxed pace for me.  2:30/500m is a little more challenging, but sustainable.  I've hit 2:00/500m, but that was rowing really hard, and it was for a short period of time.

With every sprint session, the goal is to lower your time.  The whole idea is that you get your pace as low as you can get it.  Once the pace starts creeping up, your sprint is over.  One class I was able to get it down to 1:56/500m.  Yesterday's class I was able to get my pace down to 1:55/500m. Again, working my butt off, but I definitely couldn't keep going at that rate for long.  Today, I got my pace down to 1:53/500m.  I was thrilled with that!  But, we did one last sprint before I left that class to go to spinning.  As it was towards the end of class, I fully expected my numbers to stay about that same range.  I have no idea how I did it, but I managed to get my pace down to 1:49!  I was exhausted, and at one point I said "Shit, why won't the number stop going down!" :-)  Unfortunately, the instructor asked what my pace was, so he now knows how hard I can work!  I'm not sure I'll ever get it that low again, but for now, I know I've done my personal best!

A Moral Victory

As predicted, there is no chance that I'll hit the goal of rowing 267,000 meters by August 14th.  It won't even be close.  But, that being said, I'm still pretty proud of myself.  I just crossed the 100,000 meter mark!  I think that, by itself, is a pretty big deal.  So, while I'm a little bummed that I couldn't devote more time to rowing to make the bigger goal on time, I'm thrilled to have hit the mark that I did.  Like promised, even though the challenge is almost over, I'm still going to continue to track my meters until I row the entire Kalamazoo River! :-)

What I Should Have Said

Back in the '90s, there was an episode of "Saved By The Bell" that featured "What I Should Have Said" theater. For those who have no idea what I'm talking about, here's a little background...  The guys said some stupid things that upset the girls. So, in an attempt to apologize, they staged a "What I Should Have Said" theater and they re-did the scene the way the girls wanted it.

Well, today I'd like to present my version of "What I Should Have Said". Yesterday was our anniversary.  When asked where I wanted to go for dinner, I said "Let's get Mexican!"  What I should have said was, "Let's go somewhere where I can make a healthy choice."

When placing my order at the restaurant, I ordered a Chicken Enchilada.  What I should have said was, "I'll have an Enchilada, minus the extra cheese."

When ordering my drink, I asked for a Pina Colada.  What I should have said was, "I'll stick with water."

When we finished dinner early and had some time to kill before our next adventure,  I said "Let's go to Cold Stone Creamery and get some ice cream." What I should have said was, "Maybe if we get to our next destination early, they can squeeze us in."

Clearly, I could have made some much better choices yesterday.  However, I'm not going to dwell on it.  It's one day and I'm over it.  Time to hit the gym and work off that Pina Colada and extra cheese!

The Week In Review

Well, I managed to lose .6 pounds despite myself.  The week actually started off a little bit better, but as usual, the weekend killed me.  However, I'm not going to dwell on the dumb choices I made over the weekend, I'm just going to focus on the fact that I lost this week!

Bummer

I know that most people who read this are my Facebook friends.  However, this bears repeating, so I'll share it here...

Applebee's, you broke my heart.  Our family went out for dinner last night.  My 9 year old doesn't eat off the kids menu much anymore, so he and I took advantage of the 2 for $20 deals that Applebee's offers.  They give you about 7 or 8 options that qualify.  I knew automatically that the cheesy pasta was out, but I thought the Oriental Chicken Salad (grilled, mind you) would be a fairly healthy option.  As soon as we got home, I sat down to plug in all my information on my loseit.com account.  That salad came up on the list of foods and I about fell out of my chair.  1240 calories!  1240 calories?  My calorie balance for the day is only around 1700 calories!  I really didn't want to spend 1200 of those calories on one salad!  I guess next time I'll go with the steak!

A Deadly Combination...

Confession time...

I'm cheap.  And, at times I'm weak.  You put those two things together and it can make a deadly combination.  Yesterday was a prime example of that.

I was really craving ice cream. I've been craving it for a long time.  Up until yesterday I was able to fight off that craving. However, I finally gave in.

There are a number of choices that I could have made that would have made my decision a little more "weight loss" friendly.  My first choice was to go to our local ice cream place and order the Peanut Butter Cup Flurry that I really wanted.  That would have killed my craving for ice cream and it would have ended yesterday evening.  But, I'm cheap and didn't want to shell out $7 for ice cream for my hubby and I.

My second choice was to just get some Skinny Cow individual ice cream cups. That too would have taken care of my craving and would force portion control. But, by the time you buy a few of those, you're down over $5.  Again, last night I was cheap.

So, I went for option "C", which was to go and get a half gallon of the store brand ice cream that was on sale for $2.50.   While I did save money, it was a very bad idea for a few reasons.  First, it's amazing how much ice cream you can cram into a bowl.  Don't ask me how I know.  Second, it's still here.  With the other two options, they would have been gone and done with in one night.  Now, I've got a partially eaten half gallon of mint chocolate chip sitting in my freezer, calling out my name.  And, in my cheapness, there's no way I'll throw it out and waste that money!

I guess the silver lining in all this is that right now I don't want it.  And, I suspect the kids will be having ice cream cones for dessert tonight, just to help me get rid of it!

Well, That Was Awkward...

Before I start with my awkward story for the day, I'll let you know that I rowed 5,000 meters this morning.  Again, there's NO chance that I'll make the goal by August 14th, but I'm going to keep plugging away and tracking my meters until I do get there!  Now, on to the awkwardness...

I know I've mentioned that I was a Weight Watcher member for years.  I left for a number of reasons.  The first reason was that I was bored.  I'd been counting points since 1998 and I was just tired of it.  I had been doing it for 10 years and I really felt like I'd taken away everything I was going to get from WW.  Secondly, I was stuck.  I seemed to be playing with the same few pounds for months.  Not unlike what I'm doing now...  But, the third reason was money.  Yes, I'm still struggling with the same few pounds, but it's not costing me $12 a week to do it.  Now, don't get me wrong, $12 a week isn't horrible.  But, I felt like my money would be better spent on a gym membership, which I did.  The final reason I left Weight Watchers is a little more personal...

I was having a particularly hard week and it took every ounce of energy I had to just show up at the meeting that morning.  During class our leader asked if anyone had anything they wanted to talk about, so I chimed in. (Now, let me say right away that I loved my leader.  She had a genuine concern for everyone in the class and she really wanted us to do well.  So when I continue, I want you to know that she was never the problem!)  Anyway, I was telling the class how I was really struggling.  When I lost weight the first time I was 23, worked full time and had no children.  This time around I was a 30+ year old, stay-at-home mom and it was completely different.  I never knew how much harder it was to lose weight after you turn 30 and have a few children.  If I didn't mention it before, I was REALLY struggling.

I'm almost in tears talking about everything and I hear snickers from the back of the room.  They're laughing at me.  Then the comments start.  "If you think it's hard when you're 30, wait until you're 60!".  "You're worried about turning 30... you have no idea..."  I think you get the picture.  I was devastated.  Was I 60 years old?  No.  Did I have as much weight to lose as they did?  No.  Were my struggles just as real?  Absolutely!  The instructor tried to "reel them in".  She tried to get everyone re-focused.  She stressed the fact that everyone's struggles are legitimate, no matter where they are in their journey.  But, the damage was already done.  I was looking for re-assurance.  I was looking for inspiration.  I wasn't looking to be laughed at.  So, I bit my tongue to stop the tears from flowing.  I sat quietly through the rest of the class and I never went back.

I tell you all that background to tell you that I saw my WW leader today.  I was dropping my daughter off at dance camp and there was a WW meeting going on.  The same meeting I used to go to 3 years ago.  It was nice to see her and she said she thought about me often.  I was hoping to be at my goal when I ran into someone from Weight Watchers, but that wasn't the case.  We had a nice little chat and I told her that finances were the main reason I left.  I decided to spend my money on a gym membership and that I was going about weight loss on my own.  We chatted for a few more minutes and she had to go back in to start the meeting.  It was a little awkward because I knew the real reason I left her class.  I think deep down she knew it too.  

The Week In Review

Something stinks!

I should tell you that I had just written a post on how the past week went.  I was going to tell you that I was down about a pound last week, which I was.  Let me repeat the word was.  I guess it was a mistake to step on the scale this morning because it wasn't friendly.  I can honestly say that I don't know what the heck is going on! As of yesterday, I was down roughly one pound.  Now, not so much.  Now my scale is telling me that I'm up about a half pound for the week.  What?!?  How does that happen?

My guess is that I might have eaten a little too late yesterday.  Or, I might not have gotten enough water yesterday, so that could translate into a gain.  I don't know what's going on, but I know that it stinks!  If my guesses are right, it shouldn't be hard to correct and I should see different results very soon.  If not, I guess I have some serious research to do.  Let's hope that it's an easy fix.