A Done Deal

Well, after lots of talking and planning, I finally did it.  The money had been saved.  The personal trainer has been contacted.  The first appointment has been made.  And I'm scared to death!

In fact, as I was making the appointment this morning, I thought I was going to throw up!  I actually had a nervous stomach before I even got to the gym.  I knew that if I saw the trainer, I was going to make it official today.  And that thought alone was enough to make me feel sick.

Don't get me wrong, I definitely want to do this.  I need to do this.  I've been planning and saving for quite a while.  I really want to have a workout that's designed specifically for me.  I want to do things that will challenge me beyond what the machines at the gym can do.  I want to add variety to my workout.

I just don't want to be the center of attention.

I don't want to have someone watch me exercise.  I don't want to feel like I'm being judged.  I don't want to go back to being the fat girl in gym class with the skinny kids watching me.  I don't want to have to let someone else know my weight, BMI, and body fat composition.  My husband doesn't even know what I weigh, why would I want a trainer to?

But, thanks to my good friend (who is also a trainer), I am reminded that a good trainer isn't going to judge.  I am not the first, nor will I be the last person with a weight issue that they'll deal with.  And, I guarantee I'm not the heaviest person they've ever trained!  A good trainer will want me to succeed.  It actually makes them look good to have their clients excel. They're rooting for us to make positive progress because it means that they're doing their job.  So, that being said, I'm going to try to settle my nervous stomach and look forward to my appointment on Monday morning!